Where Have I Been?

For past few months, I have been working hard to resolve all outstanding issues in my personal life. I hoped to do two things: Get a house deal done and also to sort out wrinkles in my relationships. I failed in both. 😦 Until now.

At night, I could not sleep even with a tired body. A skin analysis test revealed that I had started developing dark circles. I fervently hoped at nights that someday someone would invent an anesthesia for the troubled heart and mind. I thought best way to be in peace would be to get shot straight through aching heart or throbbing temple. It was bad.

My parents were visiting. That should have been a good thing. But they had a business for their visit and And they were doing that business for me. They were doing their best to finish it. However, I couldn’t tell my parents about the mental turmoil I faced and I couldn’t find peace within. When they left last weekend, I felt worse.

Those of you, who have been reading my blog, know that I wanted to buy a house, I came close to doing a house deal. It went bust due to various reasons. 😦

As if this was not enough, I dropped my phone inside water tub. My handset was working shakily when I started it after heating it slightly by the candle. However, I needed my phone to work immediately. My parents were traveling thousand miles away. What if they want to contact me?

I rushed to phone repair vendors with my best buddy. But they said they can not work on it unless phone is dried. I exchange my precious phone with one from my buddy. This generous friend of mine took mine nonfunctional handset and also dried it with hair dryer. πŸ™‚ This smiley is there because drying your water-logged handset with hair dryer is also harakiri. Here is the link to wiki that explains you why. The phone refuses to work now.

Good thing is I am still with a phone and my friend will have to fend for himself till a new handset is bought (he already has to buy one to upgrade his) or my handset is repaired. My phone will be repaired for 1500 bucks. And to top it, I have lost all personal data on phone. Nothing will be recovered. 😦

I was unhappy, but I made few decisions during one of the sleepless night. (Though I must tell you that I call a happy sleepy night only when I get to sleep for at least 8 hours).

First thing I did was to get myself a haircut and kinda change my look. I decided to meet that date I was not sure of earlier. My date turned out to be a very pleasant one. This was a handsome guy who had remembered me from the time I was a ugly, skinny teenager. This knowledge was very pleasant and motivating to me. This sweet guy does not know about my blog. He left for London with promises of friendship.

I decided to live all my dreams that I had been holding back because I was waiting for a trigger. By trigger I mean, I always thought if this happened, I will go on and do this. Not any more, I will not put a condition for keep things I want in life. I will do everything I want, irrespective of the fact my expected trigger happens or not. Things are pleasant in life now. I can see the light in the tunnel. πŸ™‚

I will soon publish an quarterly update of my personal resolutions of this year. I know, I have failed the ones related to blogging. But I have managed to make progress on some others. I will let you know those in my later post.

Guys, just let me get on with some new, important things in life. Once done, I will write about decisions that made me happy. I will soon be back with my public interest posts. I hope I would not be long. πŸ™‚

P.S: A worrisome thing that I have noticed is that I can’t seem to remember any personal chores in my life without a To-Do list. I have started using Google Calendar and kinds of sticky notes. Does that happen to you guys as well?

37 Responses to “Where Have I Been?”

  1. 1 dinsan April 18, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    Glad to see you back….. hope things get better soon dear πŸ™‚

  2. 2 Ashish April 18, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    Welcome back. πŸ™‚

    Btw, for the phone, if you had not even heated it with the candle, removed the battery and taken it as it is to a repairer, he would have done it at almost 1/10th the charge. [But it takes a day]. Bro’s phone fell in the river and we had it repaired. Now its working a-ok. πŸ™‚

    Does that happen to you guys as well?
    Nope, I can remember things well enough but if its something I musn’t forget then I set a reminder on my phone. Thing is I don’t need it in the end as I remember the reminder, sort of like waking up 2 secs before the alarm just to turn it off. lol.

  3. 3 Ashish April 18, 2008 at 1:08 pm

    Darn, you are using the theme that has no line breaks.

  4. 4 Rupa April 18, 2008 at 2:13 pm

    Poonam, all of us have to tackle some issue or the other all the time. That’s how life is. Wish you get the best in life and keep smiling πŸ™‚

  5. 5 Rupa April 18, 2008 at 2:14 pm

    Thanks for adding me to your blogroll πŸ™‚

  6. 6 Falcon April 18, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    Heating a phone with a candle… Well this time I prefer to keep my mouth shut. No comments!!!

    An advise, if it happens the next time. Switch off your phone immediately, take out the battery. Remove the cover. Get ur hair dryer, and use it on your phone for a couple of hours.

    If u r quick to remove your battery.. Nothing is gonna happen!!!

    ( I attended a few classes in mobile repairing… couple of years back..)

  7. 7 Ruhi April 19, 2008 at 1:19 am

    Funnily, I was just wondering yesterday where you hav vanished Poonam! Please don’t stress yourself so much. You’ll find a house soon. Be patient and take it easy.

    And haircuts are always uplifting, no? πŸ™‚ I wish they were not that costly here. I need to get mine chopped off too. Good luck with dating. πŸ˜‰

  8. 8 Nita April 19, 2008 at 5:42 am

    Good to know what’s happening in your life Poonam. All of us go through these moments at some time or the other, when things to be out of control. Every experience is a learning process to make us cope with life.
    I too need a to-do list! I keep notes, write it on the pc, on my phone and keep mental lists and send reminders to myself. I used to berate myself if I forgot something and then I thought hey, why am I being so hard on myself? Be happy!

  9. 9 praneshachar April 19, 2008 at 8:17 am

    “Things are pleasant in life now. I can see the light in the tunnel.” πŸ™‚
    Poonam the above lines are just what I was looking for at the end and they were there.
    life is a journey make it pleasnt and again it is not a bed of roses divide/substract sorrows multiply/add joys so that your life is balanced.
    Things will work out better for u and I am sure your dream house will be yours soon. patience pays madam and take everything as it comes and at the what sentence I put at the top from your post will happen
    looking forward for your more interesting posts and more creative work from you in the coming days
    have good days fillled with joy and happiness

  10. 10 Anshul April 19, 2008 at 9:08 am

    😦 , 😐 , πŸ™‚ …

    Phone/Home, Life, Hope …

  11. 11 vimal April 19, 2008 at 2:34 pm

    and i thought u left blogging for gud!!!jus kiddin…kept visiting here almost everyday; but saw the same old post with the same number of comments..and that made me wonder too. ” Where on earth is this person?”..good to see u back !!

    Guess wht, I had to change both my earlier fones becuz they got wet; once in a heavy ‘natural’ shower and the next time when I was taking a shower !!!..they work for a couple of days; but later they show signs of some kinda viral infection.

    Btw, even i was in the process of finalising a home last week, even the advance was paid.But had to cancel it due to some really wierd reasons. so dont worry abt the thngs tht happen in life; better thngs happen for people who wait !!!

    Cheers blogmate !

  12. 12 sulz April 20, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    sorry to hear you’re having a tough time! 😦 but i’m glad you’re taking charge of your life; hope things will turn out the best for you. πŸ™‚ and even though i hate haircuts, a good one can really do wonders sometimes!

  13. 13 ish April 20, 2008 at 4:40 pm

    Okay, this was the post you were telling me about. Sad about the phone. When things like these happen..it only makes me wonder how very dependent we are on technology. If we lose our phones, we lose all our contacts. If the hard disk gets corrupted, we lose all our photos and all. We’re almost at the mercy of machines nowadays, don’t you think?

    Good thing you changed your look and met the date. That always helps. A little bit of cheerfulness and happiness in some personal matters makes things go easier in the others. And it’s a good thing too that you decided to not wait for a trigger and go for your dreams. I’m sure you’ll achieve it, and will get all that you want. You’re the best, you know.

  14. 14 Suda April 21, 2008 at 5:41 am

    Cheer up lady, you don’t seem to be made for tensions πŸ™‚


  15. 15 Poonam Sharma April 21, 2008 at 6:57 am

    @All: Thanks for caring! Its good to know that. πŸ™‚

    @Dinsan: Thanks! I hope to write more soon.

    @Ashish: I have dropped my phone before as well in tub. I managed to dry them and sun and they were working again. This time it was night and I needed phone urgently as my parents were traveling.

    I did take off battery instantly and heated by candle as there is no bulb in my house. Long time back a mobile repairer had told me a wet Nokia phone requires the heat of a bulb light.Candle light didnt work as I couldn’t unscrew the phone completely on my own. 😦 Ph was working then.

    I use ph reminders as well. But now I need a full-fledged To-Do list everyday.

    @Rupa: Thanks for the wishes, and you have been on my blogroll for sometime now. (and in my reader for long πŸ™‚ )

    @Falcon: Read my response to Ashish above. πŸ™‚ I did switch off immediately but could not dry the phone. I impatiently switched it on again. 😦

    As for using hair dryer, should not use it as it pushes moisture further into circuit. It is after that phone went dead. 😦 I am thinking myself to join mobile repair classes.

    @Ruhi: I guess I will soon be well-known for my vanishing acts. πŸ˜› Thanks for good luck with dating. Hair cuts can be be quite uplifting. I had quite a short one this time.

    @Nita: I was always worried about my forgetting. I don’t remember incidents from my relationships sometimes. Could be I am more careless. I actually got more scared after watching U, Me and Hum and thought how to find out beforehand if I have Alzheimer’s. I have not told abt this fear to anyone yet.

    @praneshachar: Yes, patience pays only I am such an impatient soul. I have lot to learn from life. Thanks for your good wishes! πŸ™‚

    @Anshul: Cheers for hope! πŸ™‚

    @Vimal: Thanks, blogmate. I still have to listen to your song. I am keen on getting this house. Hope things work through this time.

    @Sulz: Taking charge is certainly the keyword. I am leaving no stone turned to fulfil my wishes! I have been to hell and back, you know you were also writing relationship-post during that time. πŸ™‚

    @ish: Some people do take a backup of contacts on PC/laptop. I don’t know how to do it easily without typing whole thing. 😦 A little cheer in personal matters can push you long ways and to all limits. πŸ™‚

    @Suda: yeah, no tensions for long time now. πŸ™‚

  16. 16 The itinerant April 21, 2008 at 9:02 am

    aah.. that explains the hiatus.
    i dont use any to do lists or anything, i just keep forgetting things and kick myself when i remember, more often than not …late.

  17. 17 The itinerant April 21, 2008 at 9:04 am

    aah.. that explains the hiatus.
    i dont use any to do lists or anything, i just keep forgetting things and kick myself when i remember, more often than not …late.

  18. 18 Nita April 21, 2008 at 9:55 am

    I hope that feeling about having alzheimers has passed. But I think this happens to all of us, thinking we have the disease by reading extensively on it or by seeing a movie on it. Absentmindedness is common amongst anyone who either has a lot on his/her plate or is intensely absorbed in the work he/she does. Therefore if I am a bit absentminded (which I have been since I was a teen) I am proud of it. πŸ˜‰

  19. 19 lallopallo April 21, 2008 at 3:02 pm

    Good luck with everything

  20. 20 Amit April 21, 2008 at 5:13 pm

    Regarding the phone, there is a very easy remedy. Wish I had shared it earlier. You just have to immerse your phone in a bowl full of rice(uncooked that is)for a day. They soak back all the moisture and things are back to normal. πŸ™‚
    And hope everything goes back to normal in your life. Even I am going through a lot of anxiety these days. Don’t know where I am going to end up in a month. Just be brave. As the wisest have said – This too shall pass. πŸ™‚

  21. 21 working parents April 22, 2008 at 4:38 am

    Hi,I Sad about the phone. When things like these happen..it only makes me wonder how very dependent we are on technology. Absentmindedness is common amongst anyone who either has a lot on his/her plate or is intensely absorbed in the work he/she does.

  22. 22 vimal April 22, 2008 at 8:11 am

    Thats ok yaar.Listen to it only when time permits.I have jus uploaded two of them so far.

    All the best for your home!!

  23. 23 Poonam Sharma April 23, 2008 at 4:23 am

    @itinerant: Then, it is better to use Google Calendars and online sticky notes. I am always on lookout for those. If you find me a good one, let me know.

    @nita: Nah! Feeling has not completely gone. I may not have Alzhiemers. There is something. I don’t know how to pinpoint it. But sometimes my forgetfulness irks me, I used to have a photographic memory. I don’t mind being absent-minded.

    @lallopallo: Thanks!

    @Amit: Yes, after I dropped and got my ph nonfunctional, I googled. I did find this remedy. And thanks for your wishes, trying to be as brave as you can get.

    @working parents: I just wish I wasn’t as absent-minded mostly.

    @vimal: Actually vimal, it’s not because I don’t have time. Its stupid office machine still doesn’t have audio driver. They should get it fixed this week. I would certainly listen all of them.


  24. 24 Shefaly April 23, 2008 at 9:24 am

    Poonam (just responding to the last bit in your post):

    Research suggests that in people with advanced education (used as a proxy for highly developed neural connections and constant ‘brain’ exercise), Alzheimer’s is difficult to detect until it is fairly advanced. This is because their mental mechanisms are far more developed than the average population.

    That said, the brain is known to filter out bad or unpleasant memories selectively. If you have had a hard time of late, may be your brain is just filtering it out. Perhaps chores _are_ amongst the unpleasant things list for you? πŸ™‚

    The irony of using advanced and technological tools as aide-mΓ©moires is that with less and less mental acrobatics and practice, we forget our own memorisation tricks and mnemonics. The solution lies in starting to use the brain again. If you like, look up an old post of mine on memory and memorisation.

    The glitches in life, alas, are par for the course. Buying a house is definitely stressful (I bought 3 times in 7 years so I can empathise). All the best!

  25. 25 Crimson Feet April 23, 2008 at 9:24 am

    i was about to delete your blog from my blogroll… and there you are!

  26. 26 Poonam Sharma April 24, 2008 at 11:44 am

    @Shefaly: You are right, hard to detect nerve degeneration unless its in too advanced stage. Nah, I don’t think it is Alzheimer’s. And I do not use any memorization tools. I need to. I have started just a month back. Things is my brain is constantly thinking and refuses to be bothered by daily sundry tasks or roads. 😦 I would surely read your post on the subject.

    Yes, buying a house is causing me lots of exertion lately. 😦 Why would you buy 3 time, you relocated 3 times?

    @Crimson Feet: Just few days I am gone, and you threaten to kick me off the blogroll. Not fair. 😦

  27. 27 Shefaly April 24, 2008 at 11:56 am

    @ Poonam: My first para was tongue-in-cheek πŸ™‚

    I am a great list maker and I recommend it highly. I write in blue and strike out done things in red, which serves as its own reward. I also do not fuss much about domestic/ admin things, dealing with them as essential nuisances, spending short bursts of 5-10 minutes on each task.

    Yes, I relocated and hence bought that many times. I have lived in 20 cities so far and I am quite used to moving. Now it does not even register on my panic radar. I have moving related lists (yes, they feature again!) and I work off them, saving time and not worrying about things outside of the time when I am working on them.

    Good luck with the househunt. It is harder in India because processes are not transparent and man, what is with those revenue stamps at each step..

    Best wishes.

  28. 28 Poonam Sharma April 24, 2008 at 12:04 pm

    @Shefaly: your lounge-in-cheek paragraph had some truth in it. 😦 For example, if you use number directly from mobile memory, it turns out one fine day you you don’t remember any numbers. Perhaps even confidence to learn numbers?

    Wow, 20 cities, you seem to have an interesting life, good share of travels.

    I gave up idea of off-floor buying only because there are no regulations. Any house deal requires you to shell out black money, which means no loan for that amount. I hate the system here. 😦

  29. 29 Shefaly April 26, 2008 at 9:19 am

    @ Poonam: I agree. The brain needs as much exercise as the biceps to stay in shape. πŸ™‚

    On the rest, I think a life is as interesting as we make it. Through work, friends, new experiences, community involvement and personal evolution. An itinerant life is not by default interesting; I know some fairly boring itinerant people too. πŸ™‚ Too much exposure to unfamiliar situations can cause considerable soul damage to those, for whom resilience is not a strong point. Yet others enjoy change and new places, like I do.

    That black money continues to be currency is really awful. But I think the power dynamic (between buyer and seller) of the market is now changing and other systemic things may too. Good luck.

  30. 30 ManofRoma April 26, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    I really hope that everything will go well for you, Poonam.

    Try not to stress yourself too much and take it easy. There is something so nice about you.

  31. 31 Man of Roma April 27, 2008 at 9:20 am

    Btw, I mentioned you and Amith and your commitment against ‘Child Sexual Abuse’ in a brief post on this topic

  32. 32 Nova April 28, 2008 at 6:03 am

    Hey! Hope things turn out for the better soon!!!

    “By trigger I mean, I always thought if this happened, I will go on and do this. Not any more, I will not put a condition for keep things I want in life. I will do everything I want,”

    This line speaks volumes! Hope u succeed in all that you set out for girl!

    Good luck πŸ™‚

  33. 33 Poonam Sharma April 28, 2008 at 11:27 am

    An itinerant life is not by default interesting.
    Agreed, but I thought with knowledge as yours, it would be. I consider myself quite learned (ahem) but seriously you are my Mystic Mistress, for you are into terrains where I have never thought of going myself. I am deducing this from your blog and your comments here and there in blogosphere. I am glad to see your comments here. πŸ™‚ I think (yes, think) from heart, but your comments force me to think clinically from head that sits firmly on my shoulder. I like it.

    @Manofroma: Thanks for luck! And I read your post.

    @Nova: Thanks girl for your wishes!

  34. 34 Shefaly April 28, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    Poonam: These have to be some of the most humbling but flattering words anyone has said about me πŸ™‚ You are very sweet and kind, thank you.

    “..but I thought with knowledge as yours, it would be.”

    The knowledge was gathered and continues to be gathered, not because of but in spite of where I may be at any time. I am glad you find it useful to pursue lines of enquiry you may not have considered otherwise. That is the purpose of any conversation, isn’t it?

    Thanks again.

    Poonam: That is the purpose of any conversation, isn’t it?

    Well said! You deserve every bit of word I said about you. πŸ™‚

  35. 35 Shefaly May 4, 2008 at 6:42 am

    Poonam: Thanks.

    I saw this article in NYT and thought you will like to read this (free registration may be needed):

  36. 36 Falcon May 4, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    @ Poonam…
    Well it was only an advice…. need not be followed if u r sceptic…. U might be correct….But I still stand by my opinion….

  37. 37 Poonam Sharma May 5, 2008 at 6:02 am

    @Shefaly: Thanks for the link. I didn’t need to register either. But article kind of worried me.

    @Falcon: Anyway I have now been told that my phone requires a chip that costs 2400/-. I said I will buy new phone. πŸ™‚

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